Newsgroups: alt.usenet.kooks
From: daemons@uiuc.edu (The Daemons)
Subject: *KotM Nominees, Dec 1996*

*Right, we've finally got something going...*
/Keyword 'something'.  This is still kinda going slow/
*What do you expect, what with these awards having been gone for the
last few months?*
/Well, I suppose.../

*Anyway, here's the Nominees for December, 1996*
/Vote by sending mail to daemons@uiuc.edu, by Dec 15.  And all proof
that is mentioned here is availible at http://www.uiuc.edu/ph/www/tskirvin/
kotm/, for lack of a better home; we'll work on something better down
the line/

*Kook of the Month!*
/By far the biggest category.../
*You mean because we've actually got some nominees?*
/Something like that/
*Number One: Bruce Ediger!*
/We have no idea what brought that on, and there's no proof that's been
presented.../
*Number Two: Matt Giwer!*
/There was a little bit of proof in his nominating post, but not too
much, so we're not going to give a description quite yet.../
*Number Three: Richard Schiller!*
/Aah, Elijah, the only guy that's actually gotten some proof posted
about him.  Schiller's a guy over in (sci|alt).archaeology, who has
been compared a _lot_ to Archimedes Plutonium of sci.physics fame.  His
best trick seems to be calling his opponents 'lesbians'.  Nice guy.
Anyway, there has been proof posted about him, which is a change, and
it's all fairly entertaining/
*Number Four: Joseph Goodman!*
/He was nominated for three separate awards, one of which he's not
qualified for.  No proof was supplied/
*Number Five: None of the Above!*
/Never forget that you can vote for that.../

*Clueless Newbie Of the Month!*
/You're enjoying doing this announcer thing, aren't you?/
*Yes!  Number One: None of the Above!*
/This is a problem, folks.../
*Yes, it is!  Nominate somebody!  Make us happy!*
/Nik, please stop the damned screaming.../
*I'm not done with this stuff yet!*

*Hook, Line, and Sinker!*
/None of the above!/
*Hey, that was my line...*
/Heh.  Go ahead with the next category/

*Weird Science!*
/One nominee here.../
*Joseph Goodman!*
/He was also nominated for KotM and the Golden Killfile.  We dropped the
last one because he wasn't eligible yet, and we'd really like some more
nominees in this category.../
*Two: None of the Above!*
/Guess/

*The Spaffie!*
/...otherwise known as the Good Guy Award.../
*Nominee Numero Uno: None of the Above!*
/...otherwise known as 'nobody's been nominated'.  Here's a hint people:
Dave Lawrence still hasn't won the award/

*The Golden Killfile!  Nominee One: None of the Above!*
/We threw out the only nominee so far for lack of proof.  Oh well.  This
one isn't going to get very far this month.../

*That's it!*
/Then shut up with the announcer voice already!/
*I have!  No, wait, it's stuck!  Help me, Kile!*
/No, I think I'll just go over here.../
*Wait, no, come back!  I can't stay like this!  I...*
--
The Daemons
The Dungeon
Kook of the Month